…who I like a lot! Cue school girl screaming and blushing! I met him in work and yeah so been there about a month and a half now. I didn’t like him straight away, he’s not my type, but then it was like, oh wow, I really DO like him. He’s funny, nice, sweet, cute and so on. Also I like his hair, but he does try to steal my hat, a lot >.< He’s two years older than me which is a first. I normally like guys my age, and well, they are very immature in a bad way! (Since I’m like a big kid myself, can’t be too hypocritical!) He’s also in his last year of uni, which means he might move away after this year, which would suck, but for now I’m going with the flow and not thinking about it, hopefully.

I just wrote a huge, long mushy post which frankly makes me want to die I’m so embarrassed so hopefully I’ll do a shorter version and a less soppy one! We’d met up loads, but both thought the other liked each other just as a friend, till his friend told me he liked me, because she said everyone wanted to meet his girlfriend/girl he’s seeing. So I was like “He likes me?!” and she told me all about it, sneaky I know!  But I brought it up when we were on our own, and well, we wouldn’t have done anything ourselves, if we did at least not for a long time! I’m way too shy and he said he was too. He also said he had a plan, something about sending me a card on Valentines day, which is over a month away! Far too far away!

I start writing sentences then have to delete them because I’m trying to keep the soppy level down, because come on, who wants to hear all about that eh? Just I really like him and want to talk about him constantly which will drive people I know crazeee, but oh well, I really shouldn’t be on this, and should be writing my damn assignment and not thinking about a particular boy which is kinda hard not too

I hate spelling that word! I always have to think about it. I spent the first day of the year working! Luckily I didn’t have a hang over, I was just tired. Half the people I worked with were hungover, it was funny Last night was fun, I wasn’t the murdered, lots of drinks were spilt on a cream carpet and cleaned. We played drinking games and most importantly spoons! Ah how we love that game, which I lost half way, normally I’m a bit better!

We set off fireworks, and my friend put one in upside, hilarious as she ran the hell away. We had a fireworks war with her neighbours, they did have awesome fireworks. We also saw red lights in the sky moving slowly after midnight, like UFO’s! Today in work, a guy who was somewhere further away also saw those lights, weird. Must be someone trying to hoax everyone or OMG Aliens aaaahhh!

I got phoned by the guy I like, he was so drunk it was really funny, and nice that he had phoned me. I was awake anyway and more worried about him going to sleep. He had to be at work earlier than me. He didn’t really remember much but sent me a text apologising and I made fun of him today!

It also snowed! The first snow of the year. It has been very icy lately but no snow. I would have been happy but as today was a Bank Holiday day (I think) it meant the bus times were like Sundays and my last bus leaves half an hour after I finish and it never turned up. I had to phone my mum for a lift, who hates driving to town on the best days, let alone when it’s snowing. I think I might have turned into an ice cube waiting, it was so freakin’ cold!

Anyways! Didn’t mean to recap that much! Onto the resolutions! Next year I will compare them online to see what stuck or not! Like other lists I’ve posted, I’m only thinking about them now really, oh well, they are always top of my head things.

1. Stop biting my nails! Seriously, I need to stop!
2. Run a few 5k’s! I want to be a runner, I enjoy it once I’m doing it, but too lazy to start.
3. Get down to my target weight!
4. Eat healthier!  I survive off bread and cheese, so not healthy.
5. Do assignments on TIME!
6. Learn to drive.
7. Be more sociable. I suck at planning stuff, it stresses me out, I prefer others to do it and then things never happen.
8. Still have a job!
9. Take more romantic risks.
10. Keep at least HALF of these things!

Well, we’ll see how it goes eh? I like the number 10 for lists and struggled to get that much haha, but I could probably add more. It’s quiet similar to my 101 Mission, so I should have said complete half of that! Oh well, Happy New Year all!

Well it’s the last day of 2009 and we’ve all got to get ready for a new year, and make new years resolutions, and break them within the first week of the new year. Everyone always wants the new year to be a new start, and I’m no exception. I want to change myself for the better. I want to get healthier by eating better and exercising, I want to keep in touch with friends more, be more creative, be good at my job, do work on time and study for uni and so on.

I don’t think I made any new years resolutions last year, I normally do and go over the years before, but that was when I kept a diary. I suppose you can say I have one again, but I don’t know.  The resolutions are usually the same, and I didn’t lose weight, have a normal sleeping habit etc, but I did get a job, twice. Lost the first one because of the damn recession, but you know what they say, when one door closes another opens. I like my new job so much more.

This past year has seen good and bad things. I ended a stupid non relationship with a guy who didn’t really care for me after a long time, a friend from school died, I got a job, I got laid off, I got another job, I started learning to drive, I went to London, I broke another camera, moved back home, I cut out bad friends from my life, I made new friends, I passed my first year of uni, I started my second year of uni, I met a new guy and so much more. Not sure what’s happening with the new guy yet, but I like him and he’s nice.

I’m hoping that the next year will have more good stuff and less bad, which everyone hopes as well. So here’s a happy new year to you all! I’m going to a Murder Mystery themed night and hopefully I won’t get murdered! But I don’t exactly want to be the murderer either!

Were good, but I’ve been working for most of them. I’ve been working in the cinema for over a month now, and it’s really good and the people I work with are nice, been out with a few of them. I’ll have to write a post on work another time though, since really, Christmas has just been! (A while ago…)

So yes, I was working loads. I bought most of my presents online, (yay for internets!) and I just needed to get another present for my mum, and one for Secret Santa with a group of friends who hadn’t done it yet. By the time we had, and I knew who I had, it was a bit late to get presents since I was working every day during shopping hours! I did get stuff in the end though!

So I had the two days off before Christmas, one day spent with friends who I hadn’t seen for ages and the second with family. The third day off was Christmas day! And then on Boxing day I had work, and another day, visit family and work again. So I haven’t had a sleep in for a couple of weeks now and me and mornings are NOT friends.

Am I finally going to write about Christmas? Well, we woke up early, my youngest brother wakes us all up and I think Christmas is the only time of the year I wake up straight away. My family made jokes about that all morning. We went downstairs to open our stockings.

It was weird this year, but we were okay with it, but its the first year my Dad (aka stepdad) didn’t spend Christmas with us for, well, I can’t remember any Christmases without him, even though I met him after I was three. He was spending it with his new girlfriend, who he hasn’t even been going out with for half a year yet, and who I haven’t met yet. So yeah, I was a bit annoyed with that when I first heard but okay in the end. He did come down for about two hours, would have been nice if it had been more though. And then I remember it could be worse, and that my friend will never spend Christmas with her dad again and I feel guilty.

So enough of all that morbid talk, who wants to feel sad about a Christmas post? We opened the stockings, I love them! My mum always gets us things we need, like chocolate! Kidding, well we had some chocolate in them too. We then opened the presents under the tree, and again, very happy with what I got! Mainly a camera again!

We had bought each other presents but decided to wait until after dinner to give them to each other. So we all went off on our ways, my brothers playing Wii games and whatnot. I read the new Post Secret book, Confessions on Life, Death and God. My dad popped by and gave us his presents, Snow White and an 8-in-1 hair styler thing I wanted. So I spent the next hour crimping my hair, it looked mad.

I also helped cook some of the Christmas dinner, well, not really. I helped with making bread sauce and whatnot. I love bread sauce and hardly anyone ate it so all the more for me yay! Speaking of food, we all hardly touched any chocolate, it was like we had eaten loads and couldn’t eat any more, but we had hardly eaten any for ages. You can tell I’m a vegetarian because looking and smelling the Turkey when my mum was preparing it made me feel sick, it was disgusting. I will never, ever handle meat, even if I marry a meat eater and have kids who eat meat. They can cook it themselves!

We did the traditional pull crackers and this year had slightly useful gifts. Such as a bottle opener (mine), a nail brush, address book, a pen and a mini lock.

After dinner we opened the presents we had for each other. By that I mean presents me and my brothers had bought each other and for our mum. She also had surprises for us. She only went and freakin’ bought me a SEWING MACHINE! I was so happy I might have screamed, maybe, a little. I haven’t used it yet ’cause I need to get s pool for it but once I get all the stuff I am so sewing stuff. I want to make dolls and bags and alter stuff. My friend has one and I’m jealous of her mad skills.

We spend the rest of the day playing The Beatles rock band game, very funny video’s and also watched Doctor Who. The episode was cheesy and so bad, but Oh Em Gee the end! They’re  baaack!

Other random ramblings, I was very happy with Christmas. My mum kept saying it wasn’t much etc, but it was awesome. I don’t expect loads off her and I was so happy with the surprise present and it was a lovely day. I wish it could have lasted longer than one day though, since it was back to work for me so I couldn’t even stay up watching the new films.

It’s not really much of a Christmas post but I have rambled on enough as it is about barely anything, not even going into family traditions completely and what I had and so on and so on, but I have been working and am very tired. I’ve already napped twice today!

Hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas!

Lately I’ve had the songs from Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog stuck in my head. I first heard about it the day before they showed it online for free and it had three parts. I loved it straight away, even if people thought I was crazy talking about it. Then it was only available to American’s I think and then you could buy it on itunes but I had no monies!

Fast forward to now and I’ve been youtubing some of the songs. My favourites are Laundry Day, Brand New Day, Slipping, A man’s gotta do and All you ever/The Nightmares real (the end song). I have been singing them in my head constantly for the past few days now, I feel the urge to sing them out loud, and normally at the most random lines. Such as, “That’s the plan. Rule the world. You and me any day. Love your day – What? – No no I love the er.. air” from Laundry Day when I’m in work… making drinks, ha yeah weird I know I am!

I looked online and it’s a lot more cheaper than I thought it would be to buy on DVD, I guess it has been awhile. I think I might get it after Christmas but I wants it now… but… if I stop spending so much money maybe I will. I’ve bought nearly all my Christmas presents. Just need to finish off my mums, get one Secret Santa present (we haven’t done it yet with them) and get my brother a different gift, he already had it >.< So yeah I want that, and since I’m on a Joss Whedon kick maybe the Firefly series. I loved the film Serenity and really want to see the series. It’s cheaper than I thought it would be too.

So yeah, I thought I’d spread the Dr. Horrible love, really late haha. I love how he’s a good/bad guy and the ending! I love it! Definitely not what you’d expect, or well I didn’t expect it. Also loving the evil Bad Horse, who is, in fact, a bad horse. I’ll leave you with the trailer, and a clip of Laundry Day, it’s so sweet Also! Check out the website here.

I never really wrote any more about Nanowrimo. This year I had a plot, a good one in my mind and I knew what I wanted to do. I started late re-started it after a week in, and then only wrote a few times. I still had intentions of finishing it though, and I got up to about 25k near the end of the month after not writing for ages. Life had got in the way. I’d started a new job and was either working, in uni, or sleeping. If I did have free time, I was too tired to start writing. I knew once I started writing I’d write loads, but I couldn’t start.

The last day of the month I planned on writing loads and hopefully writing after my shift and changing the time zone pretending I was American to allow a few hours since I had work. Then I got home and found out my cat had died, so I didn’t really feel like finishing up my novel, plus could I really have written the rest of the novel, 25,000 words in a few hours?

So I failed, like last year, which means that’s two things I’ve failed on my 101 mission. Next year I won’t though! Last year my friend won, I told her about Nanowrimo and that year everyone got free copies of their finished novels, not the year that I won (I’ve since lost that story, it sucked and wasn’t complete though anyway even if it was over 50k). This year that was the prize again and yeah, I wish I had a finished novel, and a hard copy of it in my hands. Hopefully I will do it next year!

I might try and finish my idea before then, or do a rough draft, like a detailed outline, there are things I want to change, a lot of things I want to change. Who knows, maybe this time next year I’ll have finished this, and have finished a new plot/sequel (maybe?) for next years Nanowrimo.

I “won” one year, and lost two years. Next year I want to properly win

Maybe if I write it here, I’ll bloody well do it. Or maybe not haha. I love to write to-do lists and have NEVER crossed everything off once… and I’ve been doing them since I was a kid! I have a few things I know I need to do, like three maybe, and I’ll probably remember more when writing it. Kinda like when I wrote my Christmas Wish list a few days ago. Or more like over a week ago. It’s a half assed post I suppose, but I want to post more and this is what I want to do.

1. Clean my pig sty room. It is a tip. What this really means is chuck a lot of stuff out. I can’t do that, I collect stuff, random useless stuff I don’t need. My mum calls me a Magpie. I like shiny things
2. Fix my wellies. Like now. Somehow. I need them for tomorrow where I’ll be up a giant hill with little kids in the rain and mud and they have holes in them and I don’t have time to get new ones! Or want to spend a £10 on them right now. Christmas is expensive enough as it is.
3. Sort out my lecture notes in order and write folders. This isn’t actually that bad, compared to how I was last year, that was really bad.
4. Write down books I need to get from library. Might buy one for research but just one, they all cost like £20 each
5. Start my assignment! This means, write down the title, question and outline of what I’m going to do. Baby steps.
6. Order two of my brothers presents already. I know what I want to get them.
7. Finish getting my mums presents.
8. Print out photos.
9. Organise outings with friends.
10. Book dates off work, and which days I’ll work. I have to work two days of Christmas Eve, Boxing day, New Years Eve and New Years day. I’d rather do Christmas Eve and New Years day. Mid shifts though.

I think I’ll leave it at ten again. I could think of more if I wanted to but this is it for now. I’ll try cleaning my room tonight, and put masking tape or something on those wellies.

I’ve seen this floating around on the internets on facebook and various blogs so thought I would try it for today’s post (I’m trying to write more). Here are 25 random facts about me.

1. Name someone with the same birthday as you. William Shakespeare

2. Where was your first kiss? By some traffic lights of a busy crossroads after our first date while our friends watched us and told us to “hurry it up” since him and his friends had a train to catch and me and my friends had a bus to catch… awkward!

3. Have you ever seriously vandalized someone else’s property? Nope. I would feel so bad!

4. Have you ever hit someone of the opposite sex? All the time! Friends, brothers… but playfully. I did lash out at an ex before, but I knew that it wouldn’t really hurt him because I am weak

5. Have you ever sung in front of a large number of people? Yes… last time I did it on my own I was 11 and dressed up as the rabbit from Alice in Wonderland… then I was in the chorus for Oliver in year 9.

6. What’s the first thing you notice about your preferred sex? Um eyes, height and hair.

7. What really turns you off? Orange guys…. just say no to the fake tan man!

8. What do you order at Starbucks? Vanilla Frappachino. I try to deviate from that but I always regret it when I order something else. Unless it’s cold and its a hot chocolate yum.

9. What is your biggest mistake? Oh I have loads, but then if I didn’t do them, where or how would I be now? Most mistakes are to do with guys and friends though.

10. Have you ever hurt yourself on purpose? Yes, I had a nasty habit of picking scars when upset to distract myself, stupid.

11. Say something totally random about yourself. I can bend my thumbs backwards and forwards

12. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity? Yes, Kirsten Dunst when she had red hair (I had it dyed and styled like that) and sometimes Drew Barrymore.

13. Do you still watch kiddie movies or TV shows? Yesh, Disney = love.

14. Did you have braces? Nope, I was the odd one out!

15. Are you comfortable with your height? Yes

16. What is the most romantic thing someone of the preferred sex has done for you? Hmm, my ex used to write me love letters

17. When do you know it’s love? This is tricky… its different for different people, but I do tend to believe you have to know them for a while, can be yourself with and can still be good after a crazy argument.

18. Do you speak any other languages? A little bit of Welsh, like tiny

19. Have you ever been to tanning salon? Yes, but I didn’t go in and waited for my friend

20. Have you ever ridden in a limo? Yes, half the windows were broken but it was fun.

21. What’s something that really annoys you? Screaming 13 year olds on buses. That’s two days in a row now >:[

22. What’s something you really like? Milkshakes! I really want one right now

23. Can you dance? Ha! Is all I have to say on that!

24. Have you ever been rushed by an ambulance into the emergency room? Never, my youngest brother and mum have though.

25. Tag 5 people! Well I’m not going to tag anyone but if you want to do this! You don’t have to tag me back, I didn’t.

What is up with December and so called friends acting like twats and being really mean to you? This happened last year. Mainly it was the flat mates but I was really down last year because of the way a LOT of people were acting.

This year, its happening again but with different people. Or maybe its just me? But I AM a happy person, it’s just people getting me down. I’m not really going to go into specifics of who said what, or did or how much etc as I might have done enough of that lately. I don’t feel the need to rant like a crazy person as I’ve calmed down and “sorted it out”.

First of all went out for my friends birthday and it was fun but there were a few problems at the end, and problems for a little while with leaving people out and it hurt my other friend way more than me, but I like the big group together so maybe that will sort itself out I’m hoping, but it is kind of like, oh thanks for not thinking *sarcastic eye roll*

My cat had also died so I’ve been feeling sad about that. She died a week ago today and I still keep thinking I’m hearing her, or expect to see her hopping over to me when I come home, or begging for food or looking to see her sleeping on her spot on the sofa when I walk past the living room and she’s not there. It sucks.  I’ve also not been having much sleep lately and oh surprise surprise I have a freakin’ cold. Again. I need to get healthier.

So there’s all that been going on and since I went back to uni, two of my “friends” have been treating me differently. Making me feel like crap and being mean. Not all the time, and I do get on with them and things are okay, and I was trying to not let it get me down. Sometimes I just brushed it off. I mean I’m stuck with them for the next year and a half in a small class where you do a lot of group work and travel in with them. But lately I’ve just had enough, I’d rather travel in alone and not see them outside of Uni and haven’t been doing much with them after uni like we used to, because they kept going home. So I saw other people.

So yeah, anyway I thought they were getting better and they were very mean on Friday and I snapped and the worst I said was “Fine fuck you then!” and I don’t tend to swear at people like that, so they knew I was pissed. I ignored them for the rest of it, and was really mad and upset and told some other girls in our group how I felt. Not trying to split the group up but to say Oh I fell out with so and so, but I was really upset and they could see that and tried to make me feel better.

Anyway I thought, I don’t want to ignore people when I’m angry or hurt any more, I’m trying to change that. I said Hi to them today and said I wasn’t going to apologise and tried to explain why, but they didn’t get it at all or thought they had done anything wrong. So I give up. I’ll be friendly with them but not friends.

I am proud of myself for saying hi though. It might not be a big deal or whatever, but as I said before, I usually ignore people, which is childish. But I’m not going to apologise, and they tried saying I was mean to them that its both ways. And her example was that I try to control the group work sessions. That is how I am “mean” I don’t think its the same thing as being a bitch ha! I don’t, sometimes I might when they aren’t doing work, but most times I try to go with the flow, not actually putting in that much effort when I’m lazy or tired, which can be a lot. Not good I know, but it shows I can’t control everything. What’s funny is she doesn’t realise that she lets the other one control her life. Well not so much funny as sad.

Hmm maybe I do still sound angry and hurt. I am but not, that much. This is more a whiney post than a ranty one though. I’m just hoping this doesn’t become a December tradition.

Since it’s the first of December I thought I’d share my Christmas Wish List. These things are things I am not getting for Christmas, hence the wish part. Maybe Santa will read it and get them for me? I have been a good girl this year. What I’d really like is for my cat to be still alive, but I doubt Father Christmas could fix that for me. So… I haven’t actually thought much about it so it’s of the top of my head, but here is my Christmas Wish List.

1. A super dooper proper big fancy camera with lots of lens! And a bag. This won’t happen as I break stuff very easily. I’m getting a cheapish digi cam for Christmas, been cameraless for most of the year.
2. One of those new nano iPod videos with like 16gb? In blue or pink or purple. My 4gb one doesn’t have enough memory and isn’t colourful. Sad times.
3. Rollerblades. Me and a friend used to go roller blading every summer. Then my brother chucked them all out when he was clearing the garage and I still haven’t got new ones yet. Pretty expensive for good ones.
4. A car! I’m going to save up for one and hopefully have a car and pass my driving exam before I turn twenty in April.
5. A laptop that doesn’t shut down all the freakin’ time. I’ve only had a year, but I break stuff easily, which sucks.
6. Around the world tickets! My best friend is going to travel around the world for 5-6 months with her boyfriend. I am insanely jealous.
7. Clothes vouchers and a bigger room to keep all the new clothes in. I have a tiny room with a tiny wardrobe and a girl always needs new clothes. I just wish I could chuck away things I don’t wear, but what if I need it!?
8. All of the film and TV adaptations of Jane Austen’s work. For some reason I can’t get enough of the ones I do own.
9. The rest of the John Marsden’s Tomorrow series. I have the first two books and I need the other five.
10. A sewing machine! Preferably with some skills with it too! I want to make my own bags, clothes, presents etc. Again my friend has one and is pretty nifty with it and I am insanely jealous. Plus she’s the one previously mentioned so I kinda hate her. Only joking… maybe.

So! I think I’ll leave it at ten things because, most of the things I want are books or DVD’s or some other random things I can’t think of right now. Even though I won’t be getting any of those for Christmas, I’m still getting lots of cool stuff that I want. And I’ll just have to save up to get all of the above!